I Met A Hero Today

Freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose. Nothing, I mean nothing honey if it ain't free, no no. Yeah feeling good was easy Lord when he sang the blues. You know feeling good was good enough for me.

These are lyrics from a song called "Me and Bobby McGee", and "you know feeling good was good enough for me." The chorus has been playing through my head since 4:30pm on Tuesday afternoon. You see, at 4:30pm on Tuesday afternoon, I met a guy named Dan.

Dan is 20 years old. He is a lot like me. He is a happy go lucky KID very close to my age. Dan likes to joke around, hang out with his friends, have some drinks, and let loose. Who doesn't. He enjoys all the things people in their 20's do.

Dan is a soldier, and in two weeks, he is off to Afghanistan. This is my story of my time with Dan.

I am sitting in my basement apartment at now 4:41am on Wednesday morning, twelve hours after meeting Dan, and as we sit in my apartment enjoying a couple beers and watching "Old School", I feel the need to tell this story.

Our first encounter was Tuesday afternoon, we were both going out for a couple drinks and chicken wings for our mutual friends 21st birthday. Our reservations were messed up and we had to squish 6 people on a table that would sit two people comfortably.

We were all seated very tight, but it allowed me to talk to this guy. At first glance, he is just like me. He and I laugh at and make very similar jokes. We hit it off pretty well as soon as we met. After we ate, and enjoyed a lot of drinks, we all went back to my place.

The group picked up a case and we hung out. The decision was to go to a local country bar and have a good time. As time went on, it turned out that Dan and I were the only two people willing to go to the bar. So, everyone left. That left Dan and I with a bunch of drinks to enjoy.

This was my chance. One on one with a guy, my age, about to take a life changing trip. I had to ask him "are you scared". With a very serious face, Dan looked at me and said without hesitation, a very firm NO.

I was astonished. Days after the Canadian forces lost another 4 brave individuals, Dan is not scared at all. You see, as Dan explained it, fear creates doubt. Doubt in what he has been trained in and prepared for. It reminded me of what coaches have always said to me "Champions are made off the field". With doubt, mistakes are made. Mistakes that are beyond life changing, these mistakes could potentially be life ending.

I was astonished to hear this. I remember as a little kid, playing war. I recall playing imaginary games with friends, and sometimes we would "die". But that death was remedied simply by removing whatever caused the deathly blow. Whether it was a sword in the chest, or a bullet from the "bad guys", if you took it out, you were alive again. This "reality" that I used to play in, is not the same reality that this young man is off to face.

You see, the possibility of being shot, or subject to a very common road side bomb that continually takes the lives of soldiers, is a very real one. You can't simply take it out and be alive again. The fact of the matter is that in REAL life, there is no coming back, and this MAN is aware and accepting of that fact. WOW.

As our conversation continued I learned that his biggest fear is not the loss of his own life, it is in the agony that it would leave his family in. He pulled this picture from the Toronto Sun, and his words were very simple. "Look at this. Wow."

He was referring to the woman in the red jacket. The pain that this woman is feeling over the loss of a loved one is evident. All he could say is "wow". This is something that he GOD willing, will never have to put his family through, but it is his biggest fear. Leaving the people who love him in this type of pain. He will be there to help assure other peoples families will never have to feel this pain.

Our conversation continued. As he spoke about it, he used a very common expression; "the world needs ditch diggers. And, the world needs soldiers. This is my job."

He see's this as his job, which it is, and realizes that you are going to have good days at work, and you are going to have bad days. For a student like myself, a bad day means more homework. For him, there is often no coming back from bad days. But, you can't be afraid. Refer back to what happens when fear is present.

We talked about his basic training, and the grueling hell that he was put through. People yelling at him, insulting him, spitting on him. He told one story from his training that forced him awake for several days non-stop. People around him were literally losing their minds, and he spoke to some people in training about it.

He told them that this wasn't for everyone, and if you are not 110% committed, than this is not the job for you. Many people were granted voluntary releases. Not Dan. This is what he wants to do, and he can't picture himself doing anything else.

The conversation proceeded to the issue of whether or not he feels he is a hero. Not the case. Although what he is doing is very heroic, in Dan's eyes, the hero's are the incredible men and women who are not fortunate enough to come back. Wow.

I have used "wow" several times in this entry, but I do not have any other word to describe how I feel. I am blown away at this man's perspective. He does not see himself as a hero, but in my eyes, give him a cape.

Tonight was a night where I didn't want to talk, instead, I listened. Dan said he thinks its great people like me are going to college and university, and going after what we want to do. He is doing what he is doing, so that I can do what I am doing.

I told him that where I live, is very close to a military base, and to show support for OUR troops, we wear red on Fridays. This is something I try and do as often as I can. Dan smiled. It wasn't unusual tonight to see him smile. In fact, he smiled a lot throughout our entire encounter.

We went out, and I did my best to help him have a good time. I held doors for him, picked up drinks for him, and I introduced him as "my friend Dan who is a hero." I think I may have put him on the spot a bit, but oh well. There is no other word to describe it.

What happened when we were out is not important. That being said, he saw his cousin at the bar, and they spent a lot of time talking. At the end of the night, she hugged him tight and I heard her say "I'm going to pray I see you again." So will I.

Dan is now sleeping on my futon. He is sleeping with ease. Two weeks away from heading off to "work." I don't know how he can sleep with such ease as he prepares to go and do something for real, that I have only had the courage to do as a "game" when I was a child.

Upon his arrival, Dan has been assigned with a 24 hour patrol convoy. As we all sleep soundly, and go about our days as per usual, Dan will face risk to his own safety and well being every inch of the way. And he is happy that we can all do what we do, as he is doing his service.

We talked about our purpose in life. He told me that he feels a simple act of crossing the street can have more of an impact than we could ever imagine. He told me that if I am able to make a car stop, or even slow down, I could potentially be saving the life of someone that the particular car I am stopping might have hit. Dan said that an action that is common in my everyday life could have more impact than I'd ever know.

His actions in his day-to-day life while serving, have a global impact. Wow.

I have met an incredible individual. Dan is brave, confident, strong, self-aware, self-accepting, prepared. Heroic.

Comic books paint pictures of "heroes" who are larger than life. They accept the risk involved in the roles they play. "With great power comes great responsibility" is the line echoed through the Spider-Man series. Their weaknesses: kryptonite, and super villains. Things that don't exist can bring the people, whom we can all remember idolizing, to their knees.

Dan has accepted his responsibility. His kryptonite, bullets and bombs. His super villains, opposing soldiers. His acts, brave.

Dan plans on coming back. He will be receiving a month leave, and he plans on coming home to visit family and friends. He will then face 7 months of war. Upon completing those 7 months, if you ask Dan, he is coming home again to see family and friends.

We have all put on a brave face in our lives. We build up the courage to go on the roller coaster with lots of loops on it. We build up the courage to ask someone we have our eye on for a date. We build up courage to step on the field and PLAY. Dan is about to build up courage to simply get out of bed in the morning. WOW.

Sometimes I talk with friends about people our age or younger who are entering or playing a professional sport. It astonishes us. This is a case of a man our age or younger who is going off to war. Until today, it never had much affect on me. I know people in the army, and people who have been over seas. For some reason, this encounter with Dan has put it all into perspective.

There is no reset button. The wounds can't be undone by taking out the bullets. They will leave scars, physically and emotionally. The games of war I used to be play could be stopped and forgotten. This isn't a game for my new friend.

The war that my friend is shortly off to fight is a war against a cause. Similar to the war against drugs, poverty, hunger, the war against terror is never ending. There will always be a group of radicals that oppose the norm. People like Dan will always be needed. Utopia is impossible. I don't care how cynical that sounds, I believe it to be true. I would love to be proven wrong.

As Dan goes off in an attempt to achieve peace, I am going to continue my life. Although this encounter has had a great affect on me, life goes on. We can't stop what we are doing everyday, otherwise, it makes the commitment by Dan and other soldiers worthless. They are giving us a gift. The gift we can give back is to live our lives.

I am having a very difficult time ending this entry. I have read it over to see if I forgot anything, but I keep thinking of more things I want to say. I want to say that this individual is INCREDIBLE. I want to say he is BRAVE. I want to say I think he he COURAGEOUS. I want to say that I don't understand how he is doing what he is doing. I want to say God bless. I want to say COME HOME. I want to say I think he is a HERO. I want to say THANK YOU.

My mom has always encouraged me to put myself in someone else's shoes. I don't think I can do that in this case. Dan's shoes are too big. My feet wouldn't fit. Luckily for me and for everyone, Dan will tie his shoes tight in place for us.

Be brave and stay safe dude.